Lets buy off the Falkland Islanders

The Heresiarch suggests we just give the Falkland Islands to the Argentines. They’re expensive, pointless things to own so I’ll sign up to this plan. But, I think it would be fairer to pay off the islanders than to just abandon them.

£750,000 will buy you this farm in Scotland: the weathers shit and the company’s miserable so they should fit right in. £1,000,000 a family should do it and would only cost £1 billion pounds. Let put that in context; it cost £260 million  to just shell and bomb Libya and they’re basically on our doorstep. A billion on the Falklands is an investment that would pay off in no time and we may even be able to raise some or all of the money from the Argentines themselves!

I’ve heard that it is worthwhile keeping the islands because there might be oil there. Bullshit I say. I pay whatever the international going rate for energy is. Sure, lets use the navy to secure natural resources and superprofits for firms-registered-in-but-barely-operating-in-Britain, but don’t tell it is something in my interests.

Get rid of rocks in the middle of the Atlantic, they are invariable poor investments (apart from Saint Helena).

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5 thoughts on “Lets buy off the Falkland Islanders

  1. Quiz time: what do the following places have in common, other than hosting British or American military bases?

    The Falkland Islands
    Ascension Island
    Panama
    Gibraltar
    Diego Garcia
    Cyprus
    Bermuda

    You may wish to consult a map of major international shipping routes.

    1. The implication being 1) “oh, noes”” The Argies can’t be trusted to shepherd an international trade route and 2) the UK’s political class’s egotism means the UK’s taxpayers should help provide an international public good.

      1. No, the implication being that we want to be able to control those trade routes, and not for the sake of “an international public good.” The ability to close (or “police”) supply lines carries a lot of power. The lifeblood of every economy in the world flows along those trade routes. The basic principles of geostrategy haven’t actually changed since the heyday of the British Empire.

        1. I haven’t seen the UK shakedown any traders recently. It wouldn’t be worth the diplomatic uproar.

          I don’t see under what circumstances the UK would be at global war and be on a different side to nations in Latin America. Democracies are peaceful as a rule and Latin America is a peaceful continent as far as inter-state warfare goes.

          Paranoia is no excuse to hold onto worthless rocks, even less so than national pride.

          1. Remind me why we’re hanging on to fleet of nuclear-armed submarines again?

            Please note, I’m not saying that such thinking is right, just that it’s there. Our foreign policy is based at least as much on paranoia, pride, personal insecurity, and a pitiful longing for the Glory Days of Empire as it is on a careful and rational assessment of the facts. In fact, I’d be surprised if “a careful and rational assessment of the facts” makes the top 10…

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